Chasing a Dream

To dream bigger is to wish for a life of grandeur and fantasy. Consider Gatsby: the rich, charming, mysterious, and influential character in F. Scott Fitzgerald’s timeless masterpiece. Jay Gatsby is iconic for not only his rise to fame but his tragedy and his downfall. He would always reach out towards the shiny green light of accomplishing his dream. In addition, he had everything and more. The roads being smothered in gold everywhere he walked. A legacy of his own, made by cheating the system of hard labor and climbing the imaginary social pyramid. Little did he understand the life that he had, and how he had become a king amongst men. Unfortunately, his dream and his own vision had consumed him to the point of blindness. His desire for one single woman was the foundation for everything he ever did. It was the cause of his downfall. His dream to put all of the pieces of life’s puzzle together is what led to his demise. Falling in love with a dream only lead to his death. Or consider Walter Lee from another fictional masterpiece written by Lorraine Hansberry. Here’s a father figure who is the leader of his family, despite his mother also living with him. At the time of the 1960's when racial segregation was at the forefront of society, Walter Lee and his family dreamed to move into a white neighborhood. With the little money that they have, their dream is to live in a better house, likewise to have a better life. Here we have a contrast to Gatsby. Here is a family that has nothing. They don’t have a life of luxury. They live under the speculation and microscope of White-America and all they want is to live in a better home. Walter Lee desires to be a made man, his dream is what leads to the reveal of his flaws. To make all the money and have everything, Hansberry reveals him to be a flawed character because of his dream. This is why falling in love with a dream is pointless. Nothing could be more misleading. Everything that Walter Lee did in order to achieve his dream backfired on him, and it only left him and his family in a worse position. Perhaps chasing his dream was selfish? 

I refuse to chase any dream. To chase a puff of smoke that no matter how hard I try, I can never catch with my bare hands. To me, dreams are hypothetical. At times, they can become so unreal that they are impossible (learned from my former years as a dreamer). I wanted to fly planes. I wanted to build machines. I wanted to sit behind the desk in the Oval Office and make the decisions of my country. I wanted to change the world. Now, all I want is a life of simplicity. A small place to live with nothing but a desk and a full bookshelf. On my desk would be notebooks and a computer with Microsoft Word, containing infinite possibilities. Still, don’t confuse this with an illusion that distracts even the most focused and intelligent of individuals. This isn’t a dream; this is a plan. A set of goals and aspirations that once accomplished, becomes the past. Have I given up on greatness? Have I settled for mediocre obscurity where I have an impact on those around me? Absolutely not! I have accepted the reality of my own power and come to the realization of how little I truly am. At this present juncture, I have realized a divine purpose that was composed by a being much larger and greater than I could ever be. But in order for that to happen, I had to come to the end of my own destination. I had achieved nodus tollens! In other words, I had to give up the wheel to my own destination and my own desire and hand it over to the one with all the control and all the power. God willing, I will live a life where I can give the glory back to my creator as my flesh ridden conclusion draws nearer and nearer. To follow the commands of a great leader and teacher that will never lead me astray. Aye, I make my own decisions. I reap the benefits of my victories and I pay the consequences for my failures. Lo, I continue on in this voyage. Not towards death, but towards the rest of eternity where the joy, hope, and learning is perpetual.

(Silver from Treasure Planet (2002))